Do Married People Cheat Because They’re Unhappy? Or Because They’re Bored? (Pt 1)

A man holding crossed fingers behind his back, showing that he is being dishonest.
Many people cheat on their spouses, but the real question is why…

It’s a legitimate question, and one that we’ve been asked a surprising number of times over the years, despite the fact that we couldn’t possibly have all the answers about infidelity. (We’re lawyers, after all, not marriage experts.) But with enough people wondering about what causes someone to cheat, we thought we’d spend a little time digging up some answers for you. So here you go – the fruits of our research: The most common reasons people cheat on their spouses in today’s world are…

Reasons for cheating:

  • Boredom:

Yup, you guessed it – people cheat because they want a little excitement. When life and love get stale over the years (especially between the sheets), people look for ways to spice it up. And because spicing it up with your spouse can require wading through a lot of rejection, complacency and emotional baggage, cheating probably seems easier. So they head off to find a stimulating new partner who will fulfill all their fantasies. And the fact that the affair is illicit probably makes it even more exciting. But the downside is that your spouse is likely to find out in the end, and you’ll have a messy divorce on your hands.

  • Conflict avoidance:

All marriages have issues. Some are bigger than others, and some are much harder to fix. But either way, a healthy, fulfilling relationship takes work and effort if you want it to survive. Most people in happy marriages will tell you the effort is worth the reward, but it can sometimes feel like the opposite is true when you’re unhappy and unfulfilled. Many couples who struggle with conflict and don’t know how to address the issues that are pulling their relationships apart will simply run away (emotionally) and find ways to distract themselves. Work, drugs, TV, food, sex with other people… the list of ways people distract themselves from their problems is long. But cheating usually causes a whole host of new problems you have to deal with.

  • Lack of commitment:

Believe it or not, a recent study found that people who don’t feel truly committed to their partners, or don’t see themselves staying in their current relationship for the long haul, are more likely to cheat. This probably makes sense, when you consider the fact that they don’t feel the need to stay true to something that already feels replaceable. If you don’t view your relationship as valuable, or worth making concessions for then you should probably move on. Filing for divorce because you’re unfulfilled is usually a lot less bitter than a divorce driven by an affair. Spouses who find out you’re cheating tend to be a lot angrier than spouses who are being left because their partners are unhappy.

If you’re unhappy in your marriage, don’t cheat – get out!

If your marriage isn’t what you’d hoped for, and you’re discovering that you need more than your spouse is willing to give, it may be time to end your relationship. If you decide you’re ready to get divorced and move on, call The Kronzek Firm at 866 766 5245 today. Our skilled family law attorneys have helped countless people through their divorces, ensuring that their rights are respected and their futures are well prepared for. So don’t sneak around, making a bad thing worse. If the time has come, get out with the minimum of fuss and the maximum amount of smart planning.