Welcome back. We’ve been unpacking the issue of marrying your affair partner, and why it’s usually a pretty horrible idea (if you’re hoping for a lasting marriage, that is!) Yes, we get it – you two have so much fun together, and really seem to ‘get’ each other. But there’s more to a marriage than good sex and fun. If you’re only joining us now, we suggest you take a moment to read this and get caught up on the reasons why marrying your affair partner is usually a train wreck. But if you’re coming back, let’s dive right in and wrap this up.
You’re eventually going to have to acknowledge your role in this
Many people who have affairs do so because they believe their spouse has failed them in some way. Maybe they haven’t made enough effort to maintain their looks after marriage, or they don’t want sex as often. Either way, many people who cheat find a way to blame their spouses for the failing of their marriages. So when you marry your affair partner and it starts to fall apart, who are you going to blame?
Convincing yourself that the reason your marriage tanked is all your spouse’s fault only works as long as they’re around to assume the mantle of blame (in your eyes). Once the divorce is final, however, you’ll eventually have to come to terms with the fact that at least part of the failure was your fault. Taking responsibility for your choices empowers you to recognize your failures, and then learn from your mistakes.
You’ll have to live with it when reality doesn’t match your expectations
Right now your affair partner is the sexiest, most amazing person you’ve ever met. They’re everything your spouse isn’t, and they’re the most perfect partner you could possibly imagine. Right now. But what about later? When your unrealistic expectations of your perfect marriage don’t match up to reality, what then?
The affair has fulfilled your desires in the excitement and thrill departments, and you fully expect the magic ride to continue when you both finally say “I do”. Except it probably won’t. Because it never does, does it? Which means you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. All relationships have to function in reality if they’re going to last. So you and your new life partner can’t live in an insulated fantasy world anymore, free from responsibilities and the requirements of daily life. And when your expectations aren’t met, well,… what do you think will happen?
Getting divorced causes major upheaval, no matter the cause!
Whether it’s because you’ve had an affair and you’re no longer happy with your spouse, or because you married your affair partner and it didn’t survive the test of time, if you’re getting divorced you’re going to need help. The divorce process is stressful, and so the more skilled and experienced your divorce attorney is, the better. So call The Kronzek Firm today at 866 766 5245 and get the help you need, from the right people.