Divorce changes everything, including the holidays. For some people, those changes are a welcome breath of fresh air. But for others, it means the end of family, and the death of special holiday traditions that held so much meaning. If you fall into the latter camp, then you’re probably not looking forward to the holidays (especially if you have to spend them without your kids for the first time!) And if this is your first Christmas since the divorce, then chances are you’re feeling vulnerable and overwhelmed going into this not-so-jolly season. So how can we make surviving the holidays easier for you? Well, we’ll start with a few basic tips…
Tips for surviving your first Christmas after a divorce:
- Be flexible. Nothing is going to be the same, and you need to be okay with that!
One of the first things you need to do to achieve happiness this holiday season, is be accepting. The situation is what it is, for better or worse, and the sooner you make peace with it, the sooner you can move on and focus on making the best of whatever slice of pie life has handed you. It’s essentially the old, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Although in this case, we recommend you make a festive lemon tart, complete with holly berries and served with a side of eggnog. So focus on yourself, and on your kids. Make an effort to stay positive, to look for things to be grateful for, and to practice kindness. You’ll find the holiday season is so much more enjoyable when you do!
- Aim to do more than just survive – aim to thrive!
We get it – this is a very hard time, and you’re working through a lot of emotions right now. But we’d like to remind you that while surviving the holidays might seem like all you can do right now, the goal should be happiness, fulfillment, and pleasure. The holidays are supposed to be enjoyable, so if there are things you can do to help yourself enjoy this time of year, then we encourage you to pursue them, regardless of how unconventional they may be!
- If the old traditions don’t feel right, or don’t work anymore, make new ones!
Special things a family does every year to mark certain events can carry a lot of emotional weight and importance, especially for kids. But just because your old family traditions aren’t applicable anymore, or don’t feel the same now that your family dynamic is different, doesn’t mean you can’t create new ones or adapt the old versions for your new life. Change the way you celebrate. Find new things to do together to make the season more meaningful. Perhaps get together with friends you don’t usually see, try a new restaurant for Christmas eve, or simply stay home in your PJs with a big bowl of popcorn and a batch of movies you all love.
If you’re considering divorce this holiday season, call us for help.
Single parenting can be very hard, and the holidays often add a lot more stress to the process. However, remember that many kids and parents have survived this difficult time, and gone on to be stronger and happier – you can do it too! So if you need advice about a possible divorce, or if you’re considering divorce but don’t know how to begin the process, our skilled and experienced family law attorneys are available to talk 24/7! Call us at 866 766 5245. We’re here to help!