Hey there, welcome back! In our previous article we talked about the fact that not everybody is going to be on board with your divorce. And let’s face it, some people are going to drop you like a hot potato the moment your split becomes public knowledge. We can’t change that fact, and we don’t have any magic solutions for you. Sometimes being prepared is the only option you have for tricky social situations. So here’s the lowdown…
Your Ex’s New Spouse/Partner:
If your ex gets involved with someone else, you can be certain that they aren’t a member of your fan club. Chances are, your ex has bared their soul to their new beau, and in the process made you look heartless and cruel. Which means that the new love-of-their-life is certain that you are the source of everything wrong with that relationship, and you’re also the reason it failed. Your ex, on the other hand, is probably a saint…
Your New Partner’s Previous Spouse/Partner:
Yes, this sounds a little convoluted, we know, but you’d be amazed! Or maybe you wouldn’t. If you’re in a new relationship in the wake of your divorce, then chances are, your new partner also has an ex lurking somewhere in their recent history, and that ex views you as the reason they’re now single. If you hadn’t got divorced, they would still have their sweetheart. You ruined everything for them. And now they hate you.
Your Ex’s Colleagues:
Unless your ex is one of those people who’s secretly despised by everyone they work with, then you can expect to get the cold shoulder from their coworkers in the future. Work is where we spend a huge amount of our time, so the relationships we forge in the workplace can be a little intense, and often long lasting. So it’s likely that your ex has people rooting for them at work. Which means people who think you’re a bad person.
Your Ex’s Attorney:
This shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise. After all, this person is being paid to drag you through the mud. It’s their job to rake up all of the dirty details of your past, and parade them in front of a judge in order to get your ex the alimony and child support payments they want. So if they don’t seem like they like you, it’s because they are doing what they’ve been hired to do! Understand that this is exclusively a professional situation. They probably don’t dislike you personally, but they’re on your ex’s team. So they’re just protecting your ex’s interests. Even if that comes at the expense of yours.
We left this one till last because it’s a tricky subject. Kids are often upset by divorce, and they sometimes blame their parents for screwing up their family. Especially if they’re teens. However, this can be tricky. If your kids are mad at you because they’re still working through the pain of the divorce, all you can do is be supportive and give them time. If they’re mad at you because you really are the reason the marriage failed (you cheated and they know about it), then the healing process may take a lot longer. But if they’re mad at you because your ex is poisoning them against you in an effort to alienate you, you need to get professional help immediately!
The reality is, you can’t control other people and their reactions. All you can control is yourself. So during this difficult time, we recommend that you focus your energies on yourself and your loved ones. Spend time with people who love you, and try to not be bothered by those who disapprove of your choices. You can’t change their minds, and trying will only look desperate. So surround yourself with supportive people, and try to stay as positive as possible during this process. A happy attitude will go a long way towards helping you cope with the stress.
If however, you haven’t even started your divorce process, and are still trying to figure out what to do, call The Kronzek Firm at 866 766 5245. Our skilled and experienced family law attorneys will treat your case with the professionalism, sincerity, and attention to detail that our firm is known for. Whether it’s divorce, modifying your custody agreement or getting a PPO, we’re here to help.